We all have things that zap our time and energy. Many we are aware of, some we’re not. Big confession: some of these took way longer to address than I care to admit.
Over the pandemic I employeed a few different personal experiements that ended up changing my life for the better. In this episode I share what I tried and how it helped.
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These have been some of the biggest game-changers to doing more of what I want, and less of what drains me.
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Experiment Number 1:
Think of activities in your life that bring you joy. This can include activities that you haven’t done in a while, going back to your childhood. Doesn’t matter, think of activities that bring you joy.
Get creative with your ideas. The activities can be anything, from a photo walk with a friend to going to check out a new restaurant with a friend.
Next, think about who you’d enjoy doing the activity with. If you could hang out with any person and do this activity that brings you joy, who would that be? Who are the people in your life that you love and that you want to spend more time with?
Then, reach out to the person with the purpose of getting together to do the activity. It sounds crazy, but we need to ask or it’ll never happen. What brings you joy and who would you want to share that with? Set a date for as soon as possible, aim for this week, and if that doesn’t work the next.
Write this down and be as specific as possible with it. Remember the more detailed you are, the more it helps you. Then try the next experiment.
Spend Less Time with Someone Who Drains You
Experiment Number 2: Think of one person in your life that drains you. We’ve all got that person. This activity may feel controversial but right now it’s more important than ever. The holidays are right around the corner and if you’re about to spend them with people who drain you, don’t.
We get to choose who we spend time with. You can say no to the gathering. If you’re going, you can choose not to engage too much with the person who drains your energy.
This activity works. Regardless of holidays or whatever is happening in your life, editing who you spend your time with will change it. Decide that you won’t reach out to that person or accept invitations. Even when you’re bored or lonely, you’ve got a plan and you’ll stick to it. Say no to life-draining people, and make room for what’s good.
Get Together with People You Enjoy
Experiment Number 3: Think of three people in your friend circle that you respect and admire. What do you know about these people that might make it easy to get together? If your friend likes to explore new restaurants and you do too, it makes an easy segway into asking them to explore a new restaurant with you.
This can feel random at first but it combines you doing more of what you love with people that you respect and admire, and maybe want to know better. I share some examples, when you listen to the mini-show you’ll see how life-changing a shared love of barbeque can be.
Do a Self-Analysis with a More/Less List
Experiment Number 4: I’ve shared this recently on my Youtube channel. The final step that completely turns things around in our lives is declaring what we want more of and what we want less of. Simple, right?
Make a list, and refer to it weekly. When you check in and realize you’re in a deficit of something you want more of, you can take action to make it happen. It’s a strategic way of doing more of what you love and less of what you don’t. Watch the video for a detailed example of how to do the more/less list.
Try these activities, they worked for me, and they work for many of the most successful people around. They may work for you.